Ninth House

What if the Yale secret societies really did like secret stuff?  You know instead of Skull and Bones teaching you about having an offshore tax account for when you have a multinational corporation.  Like magic stuff.  Well, Leigh Bardugo, who is a Yalie herself, took a break from YA (her YA is excellent and I don't love YA as a rule) to write this adult fantasy-thriller. It is adult and a tad disturbing but the trauma has context and doesn't seem gratuitous. There have been some trigger warnings surrounding this book which are--legit.

Ninth House is kind of like what if Harry Potter was a heroin addict in LA and lived more under a bridge that under the stairs? Then he gets sent to Yale because they need someone who can speak parseltongue but he's a she and more like a non-guitar playing Joan Jett. That's the basic premise.

Awesome book but it loses a couple of points in that there are a lot of flashback scenes which is the hot thing these days (heavy sigh). Just have the character slowly reveal their past but in this chronological time for Pete's sake.  I tried to read Erin Morgenstern's new book The Starless Sea and I had to tap out. I'm like how many books am I reading in the same book? It was like a video game with side quests I swear. Despite some flaws Ninth House is solid and one of he few books I really thought about after a read it for like a whole month.  It's a chungus so it should keep you busy.

While I know I've posted the recipe before I'm going for simple cocktails while we are in quarantine. Dark and Stormy: 3 ounces aged rum, 3-4 ounces of good ginger beer (Q brand makes a can that is perfect to split--you can buy it at Kroger), 1/2 ounce lime juice.  Rocks glass and some ice, pour ingredients and give it a light stir. Nice for the porch and judging the neighbor's dogs.

A Curious Beginning (Veronica Speedwell #1-5)

I think its weird that for some many of a comfort read involves a murder mystery. Weird right? This cozy mystery series fits the bill.  Especially if you like super sassy (and horny) lady Victorian detectives. Veronica Speedwell is like if Mary Poppins could kick your butt.  I always thought she might be able to anyway.  Anyway, there's a hot dude too and they do like the whole sexual tension thing like in X-Files, the Office...most shows. It's a winning formula.

While these are murder mysteries they always end up in some perilous plot and they have to use their wits and martial arts skills to survive.  It's set in Victorian England and while she's accurate if there is a speedboat, well, it's been invented by the year this takes place, its still full of cultural anachronisms like Veronica has modern social values. It's better this way, trust me. You don't want to read the adventures of some weird racist/colonialist detective. Well, I just did the whole Sherlock cannon and while it is still amazing....it sometimes gets a little racist. (pulls collar uncomfortably).

This series doesn't take itself too seriously and its doesn't completely insult your intelligence which is a lot to ask. All five books are solid so just enjoy it.

She whips out this South American drink from her flask called aguardiente. There are great many variations now... and fun fact--they use liquor sales of it in Columbia to fund health care. Genius! Sadly I don't have any but I do have some white rum which I think is, right now, good enough. El Presidente: 1 & 1/2 ounces of white rum, 3/4 ounce of dry vermouth, 1/2 ounce of orange liquor like cointreau, and a dash of grenadine if you have it. Pour all in a cocktail shaker with ice, shake and put in a coupe glass with an orange peel.

Wakenhyrst

Wakenhyrst is newish (2019) gothic thriller set in Edwardian England that should get more hype. Elements of this book are based on different true stories and that makes it extra spooky. Set just before WWI it makes you appreciate living in our current times. Yes, pandemic and all! Plus, both the war and the Spanish Flu is just around the corner for them too. I never understood why people think the past or traveling in time is so great. I'm like, they didn't even have maxi-pads with wings back then. 

Set in a manor house on the moor and fens (I had to look up what a fen is --it's like a marsh) with religion, superstition, some gas-lighting, outsider art, murder and a fantastically realistic villain. And a bird. The bird is not the villain. I do know people that don't like birds and I think I get it. When the starlings come to our feeder I become irrationally angry. They are like the bullies of the bird world. #BeBest I overheard them trying to tell the other birds that if they just wear a scarf they can't get the bird flu. 

Get yourself a cup of builder's tea on one of the "third winter" days (that follows false spring around here) and read this. If it a spring day--for real--then a Gin & Tonic would not be out of place. I used to guess on the gin but I've found that measuring the alcohol makes for a better drink. I know, I'm not fun. Experiment with different tonics I like Fevertree and Q, but anything will do during quarantine. I am not a fan of diet tonic as I think it ruins it and you are not saving that many calories. Also, buy limes in bags! A little fresh lime juice in your gin and tonic, a squeeze over Mexican or add to an Asian inspired peanut sauce. 

My Sister, the Serial Killer

Do you need quarantine reads?  Having a pandemic for a Gen Xer is like a Calvinist falling down the stairs. So that finally happened.

Some people want light reads but My Sister, the Serial Killer is engrossing--its like a thriller without twists.  They say is a dark comedy but it's more like absurd moments. The author is Nigerian-British and everyone knows that for the Brits someone falling down the stairs is the main criterion for a comedy. This one has an elevator scene so obviously its not a comedy. It is known.

This short read also is a fantastic audio book. It is a kind of punchy confessional so it totally works. I like to take long walks in the neighborhood listening to audio so I'll include more recommendations. I was a ahead of the game on this whole social distancing. Also, I'm part British so I never wanted people to get too close anyway. For some reason, I'm not a fan of as much physical comedy as the Brits but I'm not above an excellent fart joke. That's the German side I'm thinking.

I have my own confessional in that I have absolutely laid waste to my liquor cabinet during quarantine. So I've been more creative. It turns out that you make a good Old Fashioned Cocktail out of relatively cheap bourbon. Very counterintuitive. The cheap bourbon should be decent but you don't need your Woodford Reserve if it runs out (or you are broke). "New Fashioned Cocktail": pour 2 &1/2 ounces "decent" bourbon (I've been using Very Old Barton), a small squirt of agave nectar, a few drops of orange bitters in a rocks glass over ice.  Stir and add a little orange peel or a cherry.