The Kind Worth Killing

I noticed that the sociopaths in thrillers are usually beautiful women. Apparently boobs can make men do things even at their own peril.  Like a boob Svengali. Listen, the only boob that can control you is yourself.

I think it would be fun to have an old lady serial killer.  Who is going to suspect Alice, the little piano teacher?  Well, it's true that she uses piano wire as a garrote but who would have thought she had the strength?  Little did they know she's been totally blasting her lats at the senior center's weight room. No one knew that Alice was totally jacked.

This book does not have an Alice, but The Kind Worth Killing has all kinds of weirdos. Sociopaths, narcopaths and general idiots.  In this book we get the "voice" of multiple characters, including their sociopathic thoughts.  It's interesting when you feel sympathy for a character because they kill for a fairly good reason, maybe self-defense, but then that sympathy degrades because then they kill because someone stole all the ketchup packets.

This book is a retelling of a classic thriller, Strangers on a Train. I'm not crazy about the writing but, meh, it's a thriller. There are the requisite twists and some suspense. It is not long, nor is it hard to read. It's like a literary Snickers. Creme Brûlée it is not.

Let's drink this with something fancy.  This is from Nancy Mitchell the Backyard Bartender: Lady Sibyl: (I think she was going through a Downton Abbey phase) 1 oz. gin, 3/4 oz. St. Germain, champagne or Prosecco.  Combine the gin and St. Germain over ice, shake and strain into a flute.  Top with the champagne or Prosecco.  

Oh She Glows Cookbook

I think we can all agree this is one of the dumbest names for a cookbook.  I almost feel like she lost a bet.  Maybe The Turd-town U.S.A Guide to Cooking would be worse. Despite the awful name, this cookbook is fantastic.  I mean 95% of the recipes I’ve tried, and it is close to half, are gold.  Gold! I tell you.  Here’s the thing, I’ve been a vegetarian for many years and let me just say the vegans have really stepped it up.  This one is not preachy it’s just easy and the recipes make really good food.  

I’ve made these recipes for my mother-in-law, my father-in-law, and even my family (who are notoriously hyper critical of my cooking) and everyone is like, this tastes….awesome.  And when I tell them --ha-ha that's vegan!  They say “Whaaaaat?” “You crazy.” I don’t think my mother-in-law said, “You crazy,” verbatim but you get the picture. 

If you have a decent natural foods pantry and even basic cooking skills you are good to go.  This book is written for the home cook and you can tell.  Like a lot of bloggers, these recipes have been tested.  When you get those fancy restaurant/café cookbooks, you need watch out.  Those editors are converting chef’s guesses and restaurant measurements and the editors occasionally (and inevitably) fall asleep at the wheel. 

The copy is fine, she seems like a perfectly nice Canadian girl, super cheery and someone I probably wouldn’t be friends with in real life.  Hey, maybe she has this super dark humor and she hides it really well.  If that’s true, Bravo, Angela, Bravo.  It doesn’t really matter as the food is great and her photos are as good as any professional food stylist. No, you do not have to be a vegan to enjoy this cookbook, so don't be all weird about using this cookbook.   

This is a part of the hungry narrator series so instead of a drink why not try the tomato soup recipe? It's stupidly easy (shhh...I won't tell). 

The Girl with Ghost Eyes

How would you get glasses if you had ghost eyes? I mean do you tell the doctor, "Hey, everything seems otherworldly and dead?" Do you get holy water drops? Ah, the burning!...Well, now quit squirming that's the exorcism working....

Anyway, this fantasy novel is set in olden times Chinatown.  Our lady, Li-Lin, is a Daoist priestess and just so happens to be a kung fu expert. Cool, cool.  Her "yin eyes" are her ability to see otherworldly spirits which comes in handy as she is an exorcist. There are some fun otherworldly creatures in this...I like a lovable creature that may be a monster. I am also a sucker for any Golem like creature. I like them whether they be the idiot robot type, the misunderstood Pinocchio type, or the Crap! it's Godzilla! destructo type.

M.H. Boroson has a Religion degree and a background in Mandarin (the martial arts descriptions he picked up from the movies).  This book is researched and it shows. I must admit that if you put a ghost cat in anything I'll like it. More ghost cat in the sequel please! Must...resist...cat...pun...ahhhh, DID IT. Hey this is a good little fantasy novel and lets give those Religious Studies people some love (and work).

This sounds appropriate: Red Lotus Cocktail: Fill a Tom Collins glass with ice.  Mix 1.5 ounces of lychee liquor, 1.5 ounces of vodka and 1.5 ounces of cranberry juice.  Stir. I would garnish with a lychee fruit if you can find one.  C'mon Spring!  

Slade House

First, let us take a moment to acknowledge that this cover is hideous. It looks some kid designed it on his own Commodore 64 back in 1987. And not "cute" 1987 like jewel tone line intervals, flying toasters, or even a fake sexy Nagel. David Mitchell is a fancy author. He should have said to his publisher "I deserve something better." Frankly, we all do.

Slade House is a companion novella to The Bone Clocks. Do you have to read The Bone Clocks to get this book? Maybe not, but reading Slade House alone will be pretty confusing. The Bone Clocks is pretty confusing as well, but that is a lovely fully formed novel. This is a little side work. Essentially if you need to get your Mitchell on before he publishes his next book, well then, go for it, but if not, you're not missing much either. Pubs, missing persons, Moroccan mystics, general weirdos, murderers and soul sucking vampires, so it is better than that cover predicts. That cover predicts some stupid high school sophomore's ramblings with "I love Cutting Crew" scrawled in the margins.

I don't listen to groundhogs, because, while cute, they are large rodents and not certified meteorologists. It's still cold and winter. Drink with a variation on a hot toddy called Toby's Toddy: 1 ounce cognac, 1 ounce aged rum, 1 ounce lemon juice, 1 ounce simple syrup, 5 dashes bitters.  Add ingredients to three ounces of hot water.  Garnish with a cinnamon stick and a lemon wheel studded with cloves.  



   

Crimson Petal and the White

Dirty dirty Dickens. All the stuff Dickens wanted to write about but couldn't. I can just see Dickens looking at French pornographic postcards.  So much leg.... Hey, the man had ten children and a mistress. But Michael Faber is a modern author writing about Victorian London's "society" and all of its prostitutes. Keep in mind the sex scenes are narrated by the sex worker so they are not exactly "erotic." Think an accountant's balance sheet. Let's see here...after some accrual based accounting I find your assets wanting. Oooh burn.

Yes, this is the same author as our Christian aliens book. He has a good writing style but he does some weird stuff.  He occasionally writes in the second person (that's fine) and the ending is quite abrupt (*grumbles*).  Make your own ending? No, we already have to do this when some weird series we got hooked on gets cancelled. YOU HAD ONE JOB!  But overall, it's a fine book.  

This book is large. Over 800 pages.  It took me three weeks to read it and that was plugging away at it every day.  Not that I'm complaining, but if you are a busy professional, have toddlers, own a needy dog or writing a one-woman play...then well then this might not be the right book for you. I'm not a fan of plays but whatever floats your boat.  I think a musical about Alexander Hamilton is a terrible idea.  What do I know about these things.  (Rap battle? Argh.).

It's pretty cold and dreary these days so you should read this with a Kahlua Hot Chocolate.  You can buy the "nice" hot chocolate mixes on sale this time of year or make your own (I like a blend of cocoa powder and real chocolate.)  I put the mix--use more than you think--in a cup and add a little milk and put it in the microwave and make a concentrated slurry.  Then I heat up my milk and get it really hot and add it to the slurry. Add an ounce of Kahlua after everything is mixed.  Sure add marshmallows if you want. Go nuts.

The Book of Strange New Things

Sometimes you just need a 2000 year old ultra religious Jewish dude, political insurgent, conceived by an other-worldly creature, that was part God and part human but also wholly human and wholly God and died and came back to life to somehow help you out 2000 years later when you are waiting for the results of that dubious mole. Thank you, Jesus... it was just a hairy nevus.

So, the premise of The Book of Strange New Things is that "aliens" need Jesus too. Technically, in this book, humans are the aliens but the "natives" were exposed to a Christian missionary preacher and just are craving more and more Jesus.  Like Jesus is chocolate.

This is a dystopian sci-fi novel with a lot of Christianity in it.  Now, I have two religion degrees and it was a lot for me. It has more Bible verses than a drunk Mel Gibson.

I will say, this book is for grown-ups, which is refreshing compared to a few books I've read lately. I don't think dystopian sci-fi novels should be for children anyway. Sure it starts out innocent enough with Goodnight Two Moons, but then it devolves into Pat the Mutant Radioactive Bunny, and then The Very Hungry Flesh-Eating Bacteria.  Inappropriate.

Our narrator in this book doesn't drink.  Former alcoholic preacher. Boo. Here is a fun winter cocktail to make this season more bearable.  Applejack Sazerac: 2 oz. apple brandy, 1/4 ounce maple syrup, 3 dashes Peychaud's bitters. Stir with ice then strain into an old fashioned glass. Serve up and garnish with a lemon twist.
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A Darker Shade of Magic

London Multiverse! Where people drive on the right and biscuits are called "cookies"...wait... Well, in this book there are four Londons. Of course, ours (called Grey London) has the least magic (sad horns).

A Darker Shade of Magic is set about 200 years ago during mad King George's reign. How dare he think there was another London! So, while this is technically an urban fantasy it feels more like an epic fantasy. Magicians, kings, despots, pickpockets, princes, and lots of taverns. Our hero has a magic coat but does not have a magic codpiece. Well, this is the first book of the series.  I know they didn't wear codpieces in our London in 1813, but multiverses.  Maybe there is a codpiece universe, you don't know.

V.E. Schwab is the same Victoria Schwab who writes YA. V.E. is supposed to be her "adult" novelist name. The problem is...this still feels like a YA book with more violence. One does not have a wizard, who is only briefly in the book, make a seemingly offhand comment with an obvious plot point that will later be a "surprise." Readers pay attention to wizards. An adult fantasy book has wizards that secretly meet with giant eagles and tells no one.  It's hard to give me a sense of wonderment when you dumb it down. I DEMAND WONDERMENT. Anyway, it's a decent book and I actually enjoyed the worlds, but it's not very sophisticated. Perhaps we need more top hats.

Why not drink with a multiverse Old Fashioned? Winter Spiced Old Fashioned: First make a simple syrup with cardamon pods, cinnamon stick and an aniseed pod (strain the spices and cool completely). Muddle an orange slice and two maraschino cherries in the bottom of your glass. Add three ounces of bourbon or rye (per drink), the simple syrup to taste probably 1/2 ounce and ice to a shaker. Shake or stir according to your preference. Pour in your prepared glasses and garnish with an orange wedge and cinnamon stick.