My Best Friend's Exorcism

Like, totally grody--to the max!  If you remember people saying this or are really into the 80's yet are young (this is a thing I am assured) then you might like this very retro horror book.  He nails the 80's don't get me wrong--also super cool--you can follow a companion "mix-tape" on Spotify.  Each chapter is a song title.  It's pretty clever but this is from the author that made a horror book out of an IKEA catalog. I did forget that Phil Collins was huge.  It's not wrong to put it on there as he was popular and he came up--oh crap--I couldn't hit the advance button fast enough.

So the plot is two best friends in the 80's and one gets possessed by the devil. I did approve of the Iron Maiden track which is completely appropriate. Sounds awesome right? Well, something is missing from the plot.  Warning--it does have a bit of body horror but I would not consider this a "scary book." What is missing from this story is above my pay grade--it's something though.  To use another 80's reference, its like one of those Magic Eye things and you can't see the horse.  (I could never do those things).  Anyway, the 80's details are on point.  I loved Stranger Things but it got both the 80's details and had a great story-line. This is like someone took a Keebler Magic Middle and sucked all the chocolate out. (We didn't get those as those were expensive). That's a rich kid cookie.

Even though this is not a great book, and it is a horror book, it's still a bit of fun.  I was having a really bad weekend when I read it and it brought me out of a funk.

We have to do an authentic 80's drink (checks internet...wow, so many nasty drinks) let's do a drink that's less nasty and also a dessert: Mudslide: 1 ounce each of Kahlua, vodka, and Irish cream and add a scoop of vanilla ice cream (you read that right) to a blender--with a little ice, blend and add to a hurricane glass and drizzle chocolate syrup on top.

Girl in the Tower & The Winter of the Witch

Have you ever read a book so good you get angry? Why can't all books (and series) be this good? Also, when is her new book coming out? Crap she's writing a children's series. Why do the children get all the good things? Luckily she is super young so she can keep writing. Writing books for me. ALL FOR ME. I've read plenty of fantasy books this year and these were the best I've read in years. It's like when you watch TV and none of the shows are funny and you wonder if you are depressed and then HBO's Barry comes along and so you quit therapy.
    
Girl in the Tower and The Winter of the Winter Witch are books two and three in this fantastic Winternight Trilogy.  Katherine Arden manages to incorporate real historical events, old school Russian folklore and some modern sensibilities without it being crazy anachronistic. Rebelling against a crushing patriarchal system?  Answer, witches. It's always witches. 

One thing you should note is that I am kind of a sucker for talking animals. Behemoth from Master and Margarita and, well any talking animal.  It's a serious
book but then it has *shakes fists excitedly* talking horses. Horses don't talk they use mental telepathy, duh, they can't speak Russian because they have those giant Tony Robbins teeth. You can only hear them if you are a witch.

Horses and witches are sassy. I cannot recommend this series enough if you remotely like historical fantasy. 

Let's do this fall variation on a Moscow Mule, which seems appropriate: 2 oz of each: cranberry juice, vodka and lime juice and add to 3 ounces of ginger beer.  Add some fresh or frozen cranberries as a garnish if desired.

My Family and Other Animals

Just when you've found paradise there is always a catch.  You have to put your number two toilet paper in a bucket because the pipes are too small in Greece. It makes you really appreciate the blessing of the American sewer system. I'm pretty sure it answers to prayer.....please God go down and other such pleas.

The toilet bucket was a deal breaker for the Durrell family in Gerald Durrell's "memoir" of his spending a good part of his childhood in Greece. They immediately had to find a house that did not require the poop bucket. It sets a tone. We are in Greece but we are still British and will not conform to your poop-bucket arrangement. 

Written as a trilogy to fund his own zoo, (he was a lifelong animal enthusiast and possibly unemployable) you actually only need to read the first book. That book is called My Family and Other Animals and the whole trilogy is called The Corfu Trilogy. I think my father-in-law went to Corfu for one of his honeymoons. Yeah, I used the plural. Don't read the last book (or stop before the last two chapters) as it starts to get a little racist at the end. It's always a risk reading a book that is older. I'm pretty sure the BBC special doesn't include that part.

Setting that aside, it's full of humor, fantastic descriptions of Greece, especially the natural surroundings, in an era just before WWII. It is wonderfully idyllic and even though he spent some formative years in Greece, it is also quintessentially British. The mom makes scones in Greece. There are a lot of animals, including a pet owl. Who has a pet owl? Anyway, he takes some artistic licence of his memories and includes only the good things and possibly embarrassing but funny stuff. His oldest brother, who became a professional writer, is a good comedic foil but in real life he was a jerk of the highest order. I will say the taxi driver who becomes the family friend has the best lines. I did some laughing out loud, which is pretty unusual for me. So this book is good for if every day feels like Monday. (Um, again don't read that last chapter of the last book).

I'm going to spare you an ouzo based cocktail and give you a sangria recipe. The family drinks copious amounts of wine anyway. Add 1/2 apple and 1/2 orange chopped with 3 tablespoons brown sugar to 3/4 cups orange juice to 1/3 cup brandy to a large pitcher and muddle. Add one bottle of dry red wine (maybe it's Greek?) and stir.  Add a little ice to chill. Taste and adjust if needed and chill. This makes 4 cups. 

Darker Shade of Magic trilogy

Like a craft project I wasn't sure I wanted to finish, I reviewed the first book a couple of years ago. This series set the tone for the latest batch of fantasy novels (series) in the last few years. Not all of them are this good but they feature ladies that kick butt (and kill), at least one gay character, tons of action and minimal snacking. I heartily disapprove of the minimal snacking. They are frankly too busy killing and scheming to snack. I mean, is this world full of magic power bars? I don't think it is. What a cruel world that is full of magic but yet, no snacks.

The premise of the books is that there are four Londons one superimposed on each other kind of magical string theory of multiple dimensions. Only the "special magicians" can travel to other worlds. Grey London, which is our Regency London, has almost no magic. Even if it's dangerous to go back and forth to the various worlds I think they do go for the snacks. Grey London has the good scones and White London has the good pasta, I think. Black London is the most dangerous of all but has all the chocolate and coffee so....I mean, you're going to go. Ok, I'm making this part up.  It's a very fast paced pirates and magicians crazy adventure.  I will warn you that book two has a stupid magical Olympics. I wish I was making that part up. 

If you can find the right version of the audio books those are excellent. Book one has this British actor that made the whole thing awesome...and then they decided to get different narrators for books two and three for an American audience and I want to kick someone.

This cocktail seems right for no matter which London you happen to reside: Bourbon Harvest Sour: 5 dark cherries (I would think frozen would work fine), 1.5 good bourbon, 1/2 ounce sweet vermouth, 3/4 cinnamon infused simple syrup and 2 dashes of Aromatic bitters. Muddle the cherries and add the rest of the ingredients to a cocktail shaker  Shake and strain into a chilled coupe glass.     

From Here to Eternity

Cool, casual book about death rituals around the world. No biggie. Your funeral doesn't have to be normal. Maybe you want a hipster funeral and artisan made casket from Etsy and a wake with craft cocktails? Maybe you want to be shot into space hugging Elon Musk? Maybe he's not even dead yet. I don't know what your funeral fantasies are. Maybe you want your body to be stuffed with bamboo and then dropped into a panda preserve? They might eat it. I don't know.  The lady at the zoo said they sometimes eat meat and an overly confident duck met her early demise at the enclosure at The San Diego zoo. I say it was duck bet gone bad. One of those "Hold my snail." kind of things.

The author is a funeral director talks about funerals around the world and frankly, we are kind of lame.  She slipped in a casual breezy quote from my former thesis adviser and that was surprising but cool. I get made fun of at work if I mention anything resembling the words "thesis adviser" because I work with a bunch of cretins. They would never want a bamboo/panda funeral.  No creativity and no "vision" really.

This is worth reading if you are curious about death rituals around the world or would like kind of an in-depth Atlas Obscura kind of thing. This is not heavy-duty and not an in-depth study into the various belief systems around the world. Breezy. A very breezy death book. 

Celebrate life and the end of summer with this intriguing cocktail--I mean, you only live once. Giro d' Italia:  2 ounces of good bourbon, 3/4 ounce of lemon juice, 3/4 agave nectar and 2 cherry tomatoes and a few basil leaves. Muddle the cherry tomatoes and 4 basil leaves in glass and then pour into a cocktail shaker.  Add the other ingredients and shake over ice.  Strain into an old fashioned glass with a little ice. Garnish with a sprig of basil. 

The Heart's Invisible Furies

Do you remember those old Gold Bond Powder commercials? They claimed to heal everything from: jock itch, psoriasis, athlete's foot, tax issues...wait. The Heart's Invisible Furies is a tale for every ailment, struggle or historical event, good or bad, that could impact a gay man's life in the 20th century. It all happened for our protagonist. Think a very Irish Forrest Gump.

A big sweeping epic tale of one man's life, which is either a very interesting life or maybe a fable that is sad with elements of humor. I seem to recall Angela's Ashes was like this? Look at this tragic tale but also maybe here are some jokes?  Well, without the humor it would be extra sad. Crazy sad. Still, seems odd. I think it's an Irish thing.  A lot of people love this book. I think it was worth the time to read especially for book club for humans that lived at least some time in the 20th century. I don't know, you could be young. If so, you did not get that Forrest Gump joke...or that Gold Bond Powder joke. (Edits out A-Team joke).

I just looked up the active ingredient in Gold Bond powder and it's menthol. Menthol seems like such an anticlimactic active ingredient. Oh you'll still have fungus and be seething but pain but it will be minty fresh.

Why not cheer yourself up while doing some day drinking with Mimosa Margaritas: this makes a bunch... 2 cups orange juice, 1/2 cup tequila, 1/4 cup lime juice and stir (chill if needed).  Rim your glasses with orange juice and salt (or sugar if you like it sweet) and add you mix. Top with chilled champagne or prosecco. 

Fifth Season (Broken Earth Trilogy)

Do you know your Mohs' scale? How's your plate tectonic knowledge? Well, you didn't know you'd need that geology class while trying to relax reading a fantasy book. You thought your Bachelors in Elf Sciences would be enough.  Don't worry, it's not like the math problems of The Martian. And a lot less boob jokes. Actually, no boob jokes. A boob or two will come up in this trilogy but that's a serious matter.

The series does have cool world-building based on earthquake magic. Keep in mind this is set in a post-apocalyptic world so the snacking breaks are both few and lame.  Apparently if they run out of meat they will die. Wait a minute, I haven't eaten meat in over 20 years and I'm not dead yet, so that part was irksome. You will not die. You will be regular and have energy to run from monsters. C'mon.

I liked this series much more than her other book but I have a hard time relating to her characters. They feature strong women leaders that put themselves in harm's way. Not me. I'm more like Tyrion Lannister. First, why is this now my problem to solve? Second, if it needs to be solved can my book learning and sneaky understanding of basic psychology solve the problem?  Most importantly, can I convince someone else to put themselves in harm's way?  Also, we can plan and solve problems over wine and add a little joke too. I GET YOU TYRION. 

You'll need to read these all back to back as she does not recap. The good news is that the second book is probably the best one in the series which is unusual. It is a big commitment though.

Hey, if you have a volcanic winter you're going to be missing some sunshine. So drink a Sunshine: 2 ounces of white rum, 1/2 ounce french vermouth, one ounce pineapple juice and one dash grenadine.  Combine all in shaker with ice and strain into a coupe glass.