Monday, June 8, 2015


What happens when you put a human frontal cortex in a pig's brain? A lot of self conscious pigs, it what you get. "Does my rump look fat?"  Maybe they just feel self conscious about eating slop and rolling around in filth.  "I know I shouldn't but, wow, I mean, this just feels so right. I'm naughty right? I don't even care. Who's up for a trotter pedicure?"

MaddAddam is the last of Margaret Atwood's MaddAddam trilogy. While the second book is the superior of the three; this is still a fine series. Depressing and weird, but that's dystopian for you. This one follows Zeb and at one point he fights a bear, becomes a bouncer at a strip club, as well as a janitor, landscaper and programmer.  His resume looks crazier than mine. Apparently you are not supposed to use Times New Roman on your resumes anymore because that's boring. I say deemphasizing that I went to art school in the 90's is a perfectly fine strategy.

In MaddAddam, there really are pigs with partial human brains but they seem less superficial then I just implied.  They are organized and are certified Six Sigma black belts. The humanoids, in contrast, seem like sex-starved animals who think wearing bed sheets for clothes is superior than, say, clothes. What? No!

There is not a whole lot of drinking in this book but I think you should drink this variation of a cocktail from the Four Seasons in DC called the Adam and Eve--it actually makes 2 drinks: 2 ounces bourbon or other whiskey, 1&1/2 ounces Cointreau, seven dashes of fancy bitters (they use two kinds--regular and "pimento" What?), lemon peel and 4-5 ounces of champagne.  Stir all of the ingredients in a glass.  Strain 1&1/2 ounces of the mix into a chilled champagne flute and top with the champagne (that the Eve part) then strain the rest into a highball over rocks (that's the Adam part). For some reason this seems subtly sexist, like I can't handle a whiskey cocktail? Granted, I'll drink either of these drinks while I get my trotter pedicure.

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